To read the pervious episodes go to http://kickme.to/thebox if you don't read the previous episodes, you will cry. It's true. I've seen it happen.

Welcome back to

What will happen next? Let us see

But sir! Your not going to cheat?

No! its going to be a fair fight!

Youre evil! If you dont cheat what will people think?

They will think, oh Gannon hes so cool he beat up link I love him and wish he would marry my daughter and give me lots of healthy children. And the men will be like that Gannon, he can hold his own in a fight, yupyup Well maybe it will not happen exactly like that, but once I show that stupid Link what it is like to be dead he will learn the true meaning of 6 feet under mwa mwaaha mwaha

And if he gets cremated?

I can only hope.

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For those wondering when things are going to get entertaining, soon! I promise. Just stay with it.

Did you just completely forget about the storyline involving me?

Links funnier then you! And he works for scale!

What does that even mean?

Look, stop it, Ill get back to the main storyline next ep or the one after that! HECK! Half the people watching probably dont even know what your talking about! So stop ruining their enjoyment! BACK TO THE SHOW!

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Now let us go to highrul castle. Isnt it awe inspiring? No, because you cant see it. Because the man who made this is to lazy to copy and past the image of the castle just as a backdrop. It doesnt matter that it would look much better, or give the reader a feeling of area. Noooo he just wants to be lazy. Anyways people are talking.

Look, I dont want to fight him.

If you dont, our land will burn Link. BURN. BURN. BURN.

I understand that youre a scared little cry baby wussy man, but you are not going to let my kingdom, like the triforce said, burn burn burn.

Technically isnt this a queendom?

Well if were going to be technical Im pretty sure its a princessdom.

You know what? Im going to go find out. Ill be back sometime after the burning.

LINK! YOU MORON! YOU MAY BE AN ASS! YOU MAY BE A JERK! INSINTIVE AND STUPID! STUPID! STUPID AS HELL! AND YOU HAVE THE FASHION SENSE OF A FAIRYTALE! BUT YOU ARE NOT A COWARD! AND YOU ARE NOT ONE TO WALK AWAY FROM RESPONSIBILITY! YOU ARE AN INCREDIBLE MAN WHO WHITHOUT, MY KINGDOM WOULD LONG AGO HAVE FALLEN UNDER A WAVE OF DARKNESS THAT WOULD NEVER LIFT! THE TRIFORCE IS NEVER WRONG! AND LINK! I NEED YOU! I NEED YOU TO HELP ME! MY PEOPLE! AND MY KINGDOM!

Yeah, great. You know some day Gannon is going to challenge me and Im going to be busy having a midlife crisis and to busy crusien around in my flying cloud or whatever to even bother considering saving everyone.

I really dont see what your problem is link. Everyone knows you can take him any time you want.

I told earlier, no I cant! Why is everyone so against the cheating thing? A little evening of the odds never hurt anyone

If the people find out that their hero had to cheat for his victory, it will be just as demoralizing as if you had lost. Link, you are this kingdoms shinning example, the symbol of heroism. Every man woman and child can believe in you, and because of that we hold against the darkness. A darkness staved by the will of one kingdom, held up by the belief in one man.

OKAY! OKAY! Everyone stop with the vivid imagery and Ill fight him. Okay? Sheesh. What if no one found out about the cheating?

NO CHEATING!

Link! Youre the legendary hero. You were trained by the Mountain hermit Zanpon, and even surpassed him. No one has seen a warrior like you, and they wont ever seen one after. Your link! Ask anyone, and theyll go, ooooh link hes so cute, I just want to take a bite out of him all over. Just a big ol tasty bite. Why? Because your link!

Yeah um okay see about that whole Zanpon hermit thing Thats kind of a funny story see

Flaaaashbaaaaack
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Hey, whos the cute girl with the purple hair?

Yes it is! Its a figure of speech showing how I had no direction in life! I was just wallowing, you know, doing nothing.

Hey dude uh ya uh how is it hanging? Things going well?

Looks like your doing something right there.

SHUT UP! I dont care if nothing else is funny in the whole flashback, just shut up!

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I promise, I PROMISE that is not true, and it will be funny. If its not funny that is your fault, and not mine.
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Okay, so this will be a silent flashback? Right?

Good! All right, so ware was I? Dont answer that. So I had no direction in life

Hey guy how is it hangingman? Things going well guy?

Thats not what you said the first time!

SHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUP! LET ME FLASHBACK THE WAY I WANT! ALLRGIHT! Good, okay. All right. Now

Hello old man.

Hello young man, I am Zanpon .

Hey dude. Im Link.

Ah link, I have heard of you. The boy who is good at everything he tries. That masters anything he bothers to attempt. That shows so much promise, and yet wishes to do nothing. So lacking in focus. I have been looking for you.

Sadly man, I have not been looking for a creepy old dude who leaps out from behind trees, so uh yeah I need to go wait did you say Zanpon ?

Yes.

No way! Your like you know, like so cool man. If only I could be someone like you. I mean your a legend.

You could be greater. Oh link, you cant even see your own potential. But I can show it to you! IF youll come with me and let me train you. Ill teach you to fight, teach you to live! To breath, to see everything around you. To feel and learn. To be one with everything and yet compromised by nothing.

Oh, I dont think you got the right guy, like I mean, Im kinda good at video games but I mean thats no--

I know greatness when I see it. And you link, will be the greatest. Now link, we will train long and hard, but you can end the training anytime, you can prove that you are ready for the dangers that lie ahead of you if you can do just one thing.

Yeah?

CATCH THE QUARTER!

Why did you just bounce a quarter off my head?

Young people today, no sense of humor. Well come along Link. Your training begins!

And so I Trained, first with a wooden sword of corse.

You show great progress, but can you

CATCH THE QUARTER!?

Youre senile, arent you?

Not at all young man. Im just testing your ability to react, no matter the situation. You failed. When you no longer fail, and are a failure. You will be successful and your training will be complete.

Yeah and when youre no longer a jerk face youre training will be complete.

Im not training

Ah, still a jerk face. When will you ever learn?

*Sigh* fine thats all for today.

I trained day in and day out, taking to everything like a worm to the dirt. Pay no attention to the way I look, I was going threw an odd phase.

IGNORE IT!

Yes focus link, focus. Focus hard, focus on your goal and

CATCH THE QUARTER!

I hate you.

He just wouldnt stop, no matter when or what, the man was insane. Kept yelling

CATCH THE QUARTER!

CATCH THE QUARTER!

CATCH THE QUARTER!

I never could I started to lose it. Even when I was ready, he he was a monster.

CATCH THE QUARETER!

How the heck was I supposed to catch the quarter when you throw it BACKWORDS?

A true warrior would have found a way.

Slowly my mind deteriorated.

CATCH THE QUARTER!

So close and yet so far. you will never be a true warrior.

Not this time old man.

NOOOOO! No It popped out no.

A nice try, but ultimately useless. Like you.

no

I was in traction for over a month yet the only thing I could think about was that quarter.

Must... catch... quarter... can't... let... devil... in... old... man... form... win...

Is that really you?

Yeah I was pretty messed up. Physically and emotionally. Then it happened.

CATCH THE QUARTER!

RAURG!

I swung so hard and so fast I cut the quarter in half.

that was a show of incredible skill, but Im afraid that it wasnt the point of th--

DIE OLD MAN! DIE!

Nothing ever felt so good, nothing.

It was that day that I vowed that no one could ever learn the terrible truth of what happened that day wait a second YOU ALL KNOW!

DIE ZELDA HARLOT!

TAKE THAT YOU PERVERTED PIXIE!

MWAHAHAH! YOU EXPLODED GOOD TRIFORCE!

Or that is what WILL happen if any--

Of you even consider telling anyone about what I just told you. Do you understand?

Yeah I understand, but you didnt have to describe our deaths so graphically link.

Yes, yes I did.

Im going to have nightmares for weeks.

But aside from the horrible graphic show you will at least attempt to defeat gannon?

Yes Ill fight him. If I die it is so all your faults though.

Fair enough.

DNE
TO BE CONTINUED