Hekko! Vortex here, and this is Vortex's box. My TV show. We've been on for awhile, and while we have loved every minute of it... we....... we? Well Today I thought Id have a verity show! Anything and everything I want, from one moment to the next. Could be dogs or giant mechs. And guests, lots of guests. AND HABALO! More on Habalo later. See the reason Im doing this is that Vortex's box was always been intended to be a TALK SHOW. Somehow along the way it became an adventure spanning five universes. It never was what I really wanted. I mean Vortex's box is a talk show, but the last time it got to do anything talk show like was....... 20 episodes ago! THAT IS CRAZY! So Im putting every single Vortex's box storyline on hold... yes all four of them... or five... three? More then one. They are on hold so that today, the verity show can happen! As always you can read up on vortex's box at http://kickme.to/thebox . Also I have finally decided upon a logo for all things me. From now on this little baby will show up some ware on everything I make.

I love it. I think it's pretty distinctive. Also people see different things in it. Some people see a frog fetus, other people see a cat. One person saw a slug! It is perfect. Now on to the show!

today's show's first topic is...

BROTHERLY LOVE, WARE HAS IT GONE?

Our first two guests are Megaman, and Protoman, stars of the hit video game series by the same name. Some random trivia for those that are interested, in Japan the series is known as Rockman, and that Megaman's actual name is Rock. And Protomans actual name is blues. Some people already know this. If you did not, now you do.

Welcome, Im glad you could join us.

Well Im just absolutely siked to be here. I mean it's really great.

I hate you.

You know what blues? I'm not to fond of you either! How was I supposed to know that when doctor light created you he created a stupid soar headed loser muffin?

Muffin?

Oh Im sorry! Is the comparison to a tasty breakfast crumpet like thing to much for you to take. Oh! look at me, Im blues, Im afraid of muffins.

I didn't say anything like that.

OH noooo! I wet the bed in feaaaaaaar! I wet the bed in terror from muffins!

You don't make any sense.

Your a muffaphobe.

LOOK! Look at what I have to deal with.

Your terrible debilitating fears... I know folks, Im sorry for him to. Why I remember just last week mom forgot, and gave us muffins for dinner. He nearly had a spazz attack.

... we are robots, we do not have a mom.

I can see that there is a lot of built up anger between you two.

What? Dr Light never told you? Oh that's right, I have a mom, sadly you had a different mom, see apparently your mom was female boxer hound.

I'LL KILL YOU!

Bring it on you S.O.B.

Don't worry folks I had them disarm their weapons before coming on the show. So their is no danger of an actual fight.

OH GOD! GET OFF HIM!

I'M GOING TO KILL YOU! AND THEN HAVE DOCTOR LIGHT REMAKE YOU! THEN I'LL KILL YOU AGAIN! AND AGAIN! AND AGAIN!

CUT TO COMERICAL! CUT TO COMERCIAL!

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Hai, have yeu ever found yourself walking around and suddenly out of no ware down from the sky comes an evil invading hoard from space? If yeu're like me, yeu have. No Im not an actor, Im a normal person just like yeu. And Im here to tell yeu about the benefits of giant robots. What if yeu were stuck in that same situation, invading hoard and yeu had no giant robot at your disposal? why your options would be few, and far between. But if you have your own officially sanctioned mecharobot from Inasu enterprises your options suddenly bloom!

Why, yeu could pump the aliens full of lead!

Or laser then with fiery death!

Even blow them to smithereens.

And that's just the basic model. For only a few more hundred thousand many more options can be available. Such as the ever popular flame unit. So don't be caught out in the open without a giant robot to protect yeu, order one today! Yeu won't be disappointed. Unless yeu don't order one. Then you will be very disappointed. Don't make me come to yeur house and show yeu just how effective these things are, BUY ONE!

They are sooo beautiful...

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Now that things are cleaned up here we can move on. We have a great short to show you, about what life would be like in space! It's about a space ship called tupercoulous. Enjoy! Afterwards we have a few interviews planned.

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What the hell is THIS?!

Ma'am, I don't know but it looks like a spleen.... Ma'am.

Why was it in my chair?!

OH! That's the new ambassador Ma'am.

Oh... ambassador Flandarg I am so sorry.

I'll get her... it... him... to its... hers.... his... quarters right away Ma'am.

Good, you get right on that. So now I can sit in my new chair, no squirmy things. This is quite possibly the most uncomfortable captain's chair, ever.

Well Ma'am you see, as you know, well, you were not the fleet's first choice for captain. And the original captain was at least four times your size.

Ah, well maybe we can get it replaced soon?

We will do our best Ma'am.

Oh and keep up the sauluting, makes me feel importaint.

Yes Ma'am.

It's nice to run a ship, especially one as nice as tapurculous. Have we left port ensign?

Yes Ma'am. And heading to starbreach alpha right on schedule. The test flight is going smoothly.

It makes me wish something would go wrong, just so I could really test this baby out. Most powerful war ship, fastest scouter, and best equipped science vehicle in the fleet all rolled into one and nothing to actually test it on.

Don't jinx it ma'am.

Oh come now, life doesn't work like that and you know it.

*Sure enough life didn't work like that, for instead of something going wrong right then, it happened several hours later*

WHAT WAS THAT?!

Something has latched onto the ship!

Put it onto the screen!

We don't have a screen ma'am.

What do we have?

A wall.

WELL PUT IT ON THE WALL!

um... okay... Ill have to draw a picture and tack it up...

... what do we do?

Oh, they electrified the hull and it ran off.

No one asked me?

The ship was about to be torn apart ma'am, no offense, there was no time!

And you let me make an ass of myself?

Yes Ma'am.

fine, whatever, I need a shower.

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She made me give her a shower scene, she was going to kill he, it's tasteful though. Really it is. I did it silouet! Silouet's are cool.
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Nothing beats a good shower. Wait, why the hell is the water green? OH MY GOD IT BURNS! SOMEONE HELP FOR GOD'S SAKE!

Ma'am! ma'am! are you all right! I've turned it off! We'll get you cleaned up Ma'am.

What... the... hell...

You had the shower turned to temaxion, they use high powered acids to burn off extra thick layers of the tough armor like exoskeletons they have.

... this.... ship... is... crazy...

[url= http://www.askdrmike.com/MattWeb/Pics/Vorte x's%20box,%20page%20pics/tapurculous/taaaperculous.wav]tapurculous song of dooooom[/url]

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welcome back to the show. I hope you liked Tapirculis. We have with us now the past guest hosts of vortex's box. Welcome to the show guys.

Thanks.

We get free cake later right?

I like free cake! Sounds good.

I didn't say anything about free cake...

To bad, now we get free cake later.

There is no free cake! NONE!

No free cake? What a rip. I'm getting out of here then.

you know who has cake? Bakeries. Let's go, I know a great one.

Lets!

What the HELL just happened.

Your guests left.

I can see that. I just don't get it, I always have this strange helpless feeling, like i'm not in control of my own show.

I know the one, feel small? Insignificant? Like no one respects yeu or actually cares about yeu? Wish people would give yeu the time of day and stop acting as if when your mouth opens nothing comes out?

Do I ever.

What you need is a mecha! Maybe even two.

Hmmm... wait, who are you? How'd you get in here?

That's not important, what is important is our models now come with laser resistant armor plating. Also they have a CD player, tape player, radio. Intuitive piloting as well. Easier to use then yeur own feet. Also sense they are so new, the government hasn't gotten around to forcing yeu to get a license yet, so anyone can pilot one! Sounds great, ne?

... your a salesmen?

Saleskitten.

So... how... did you get in?

How many robots would yeu like to buy? One? Two? Five? If yeu buy 10 it's the 15% off bulk value!

No thank you.

Yeur going to buy one of my robots.

no?

Mark my words, with red ink, you WILL buy one of my mecha, or more. Yeu don't have a choice in the matter. Okei?

Lady your starting to creep me out. Please leave?

Fine who needs yeu! Lots of other people want my robots! People who don't suck. And now, into the night, I vanish!

Now that crazy lady has gone, we can move on. Our next guest is a chirpy little fellow with big ears. Sega's original mascot! that's right everyone's favorite Alex the-

BUY MY MECHA!

GET THE HELL OUT CRAZY LADY! God! My heart!

We have the newer compact model, small and cute, great for those hard to reach places.

Ware the heck is Alex the kid?!

*meanwhile, backstage Alex the kid is tied up.*

It isn't like anyone knows who I am anyways...

*meanwhile, fronstage.*

Comes in any paint style yeu like! how about some cool flames down the side? A nice little logo of yeur name? Heck Ill even throw in the water proofing for free!

Someone... anyone... help? Crono... ware did Crono go?

We can even get you tented glass, nothing intimidates more then tinted one way glass!

*meanwhile, back backstage.*

Crono? She tied you up too?

Yeah...

How? I thought you were a super warrior swordsmen extraordinaire?

She cheated.

how?

She used a dart gun.

How is that cheating?

It is the ultimate weapon! No one has ever defeated the dart gun! No matter how powerful, how badass, how cool you are... the poison dart will defeat you.

Really?

Go ahead, name someone.

uh... batman?

Hundreds of times.

Ven diesel?

You better believe it.

That guy from crouching tiger hidden dragon?

That's how he DIED.

Wow... why don't more people use them?

The hero community does it's best to downplay there use and distribution. Getting a dart gun license is even harder then getting a permit to dump radioactive waste in a school yard.

So... then how do people still get them?

Evil people are notoriously bad at fallowing laws.

*back fronstage*

Please... leave me alone, I don't want a robot!

Oh but we have this great new installment plan, for just 20 bucks a day for the rest of yeur life, yeu can have one right now!

go away, just go away!

Here take my card, if yeu change your mind. Call me. Bye!

weird...

I said I wanted a new company to fund vortex's box, it's fine they say! don't worry! we'll send down our representative, run a commercial or too, and pay for everything. They never mentioned they would be sending a psycho! GRAA! DO WE HAVE ANY GUESTS LEFT?!

OOOOOH YEAAAAAAH!

Kool-aid man! You have saved me yet again!

Kool.

ah you, you are defiantly my favorite corporate logo.

Thank you kindly.

What is it like being a registered trademark?

You'er always making public appearances, people know who you are when you are walking down the street. I used to walk down the street and no one gave me a second look, now everyone is like 'LET US TAST OF YOUR LIQUIDS!' I love it.

Do you think fame has changed you at all?

Yes. Completely! I used to be a shy nice person, now i'm a total jerk. People ask for signatures, I charge them. Kids want to touch me, I push them over. My dressing room is not perfect? I drown the person who screwed it up inside my great body.

You truly are an inspiration for us all.

I know, to bad we can't all be made of a sugary drink!

Ahahahahaha! oh you are to much. Sadly that is all the time we have for today, I hope to have you back sometime.

I hope to be back some time.

That's our show today folks, maybe next time Ill actually continue one of the storylines, we'll see! Hope you liked today's box. BYE!

You forgot meeeeee!

Um... who are you?

Habalo! The world's greatest... me!

Oh right, sorry I forgot about you. Well, to tell you the truth I didn't, I just decided about half way through the show that you just werent very funny, and decided to cut the whole habalo skit.

But i'm cuuuuuute.

Yeah, sorry that's just about all you have going for you.

My name as well, Habalo! What does it stand for? Happy little ball of foam!

Right, amazing. Okay show ends. Bye everyone.

DNE