Hi everybody! I have just experienced a personal revelation, and I wish to share it with you all.

Many people have pondered the meaning of life. The rich and aspiring businessmen think it's the pursuit of money. Others believe it's sex. Many believe it's to reproduce. Some think it's fame. Most philosophers think it's the constant strive for existence. Buddhists are striving for Nirvana. Christians are striving to meet God. Dean's List people are striving for knowledge. But I believe this thought cancels them all out.

Life is the imperfect, constant, unending, mad strive for one's own personal opinion of happiness.

Yes, folks, happiness. Joy, jolliness, amusement, whatever you call it, it's happiness.

Money, sex, Nirvana, meeting God, knowing everything, and fame are all forms of happiness. Some people may disagree with some of these, but anyone looking for fame believes that it will make them happy. Money can't buy you happiness? In this world, yeah right! In America (and Alberta), money buys you healthcare. Without healthcare, you'll get really sick. That's not happy, is it? Money buys you possessions. Possessions make some people happy. Buddhists don't want anything. Hell, the good ones don't even want Nirvana. But when that happens, they hit it, don't they? They're happy. Sex makes you feel good. Happy. When people do pot, they feel happy. That's why they do it. People who are addicted to nicotine smoke more because if they don't, they feel like crap. All things living (excepting the ones without nerve endings) avoid pain at all costs, because it makes them sad, the opposite of happy. People play video games, because they're fun. Happy. People who download music like music and don't have to pay for it, therefore, they're happy. People who don't are feeling riteous and happy. People who cut themselves do it because it makes them feel better. Gives them this funny feeling inside, that sorta feels like you're on crack. They're happy.

Reproduction can't be the meaning of life, because some people just don't want to have a kid. Some people don't get any sex, and don't really give a crap. Some people feel that by not making babies, they're helping to slow down the population growth, which makes them feel happy.

Existence can't be it, because people who have been in pursuit of happiness and have never found an ounce of it, and don't feel they ever will, will kill themselves, therefore ending their existence. A suicidal person (I've been one) feels so bad that if there is happiness in or out of reality, it definitely ain't here, so they kill themselves, hoping to God they'll go somewhere that doesn't suck as much as this place. Take one of those diehard soldiers. They'll go "BRING IT ON, BYOTCH!" knowing they'll die, but at least for the good of whatever they're dying for. That makes them happy.

Knowing everything is also an example. People who want to know everything, think they're striving for it. But they're actually striving for their own form of happiness. I might be wrong, because maybe it sucks to know everything. I've never been there to prove it, because I don't know much.

Total jackasses, like Anonymous from my Stagecraft class, will pick on other people because they feel really bad about themselves, and making other people feel worse will make them feel they are better than that person, therefore happy.

People will kill other people because they want power. So they'll go and kill the people in power, and anyone against them. I'm talking about Hitler here. On a less extreme end of the power gradient, people will swear at other people during elections, lie, cheat, and act like children because they want to be President/Premier/Prime Minister. That would make them happy.

People lie so they can have respect. Respect equals happiness.

People steal so they can pawn it for money-happiness, or keep it and have more possession-happiness. They'll use the money they get from pawning it to buy other stuff, or buy drugs.

Everything anyone strives for -- fame, alcohol, money, a home, warmth, love, sex, a nice pimpin' car, a fast computer, God, Nirvana, a good Kharma, winning the Lottery -- can be converged with happiness. At least, their own vision of happiness. People will follow it so blindly that at times, they will walk all over other people to achieve it. Not yet have I met a human being -- or an animal -- that does not follow this example. Once, I was in an earthquake. A real, full-blown one. I was vacationing in Japan when it happened. Yes, it was the Kobe earthquake. Anyways, despite the calmness, politeness, and courtesy of people in drills, I watched a hi-rise empty out of people, very fast. A thirty-year-old man (YES, I am speaking what I saw with my very eyes) knocked over and ran on top of an old lady of at least ninety, trying to get out of this building. It got so bad, that I saw a man hit another man with pepperspray, just so he could get out of the path of a falling powerline.

But then, happiness is like anything that can be measured. It can be measured to any length up to infinity, which is unattainable. Therefore, total happiness is unacheivable, making life imperfect.

If anyone thinks I'm a dumbass, feel free to tell me why. If you want to add anything to my little meaning of life, go ahead. If you wish to worship me, the floor's down there. However, if you think I'm the Antichrist, keep it to yourself. I don't want any preaching of my satanicism, so you Catholics had better put those crosses away NOW.