OOC: lol I can't be patient enough to wait

IC: After running for quite a while, the team stopped and rested.

"I say, I'd rather not do that again" Lokki panted.

Geo said nothing. he just took a swig.

Suddenly a shadow fell over them. A massive shadow.

They looked up.

It's cute little nose twitched, and it looked at them through large watery eyes. It pricked up it's brown furred ears.

It was a rabbit.

An adorable rabbit.

Well it would have been if it wasn't 100 foot high, wielding a large truck filled with Farmer Fred's Top Quality Cheddar Cheese.

"MY CHEEEESE" it roared at them, as it proceided to stamp on them.

The group's reaction was "Oh sh-"

Before the group of four could catch their second wind, pouncing through the thicket of bushes, and aiming straight for their heads, was an almighty collection of various clothed monkeys, all of whom bore the same menacing red eyes from before. Their mouths wide open, fangs bore and sharp claws aimed for their eyes.

In a burst of adrenaline, Pachs body suddenly moved, and the next instant, the monkey that would have almost gouged his eyes out was on the floor, a small crater surrounding hiit by the force of impact which would have knocked it down. Pachs hand had moved from its previous position, and seemed as though Pach had swatted him down.

But what was more was that there was a giant line of blood across the monkey where it seemed to have been cut.

The other monkeys which had first charged at the other 3 pirates had also missed their targets, either they had dodged, or were smacked by the individuals own means.

Geez, you things are more irritating then mosquitoes! Pach claimed. Two more monkeys jumped into the air, aiming for him. With Pach seeing them coming, he darted towards them, turning at first to dodge both assailant monkeys passing his sides, and then quickly stabbing outwards with his index fingers outstretched into the two monkeys backs. After a small cry from each of them, they fell onto the ground, twitching.

I doubt well be able to search this island for the treasure with these irritating gits on our back we should take them out and then move on! Pach suggested, dusting his torn suit down.

Lokki squinted quizzically up at the lagomorphic behemoth. "How queer," he remarked as he leapt sideways to avoid a crushing, furry death. He rolled forward to dodge another elephantine paw and leapt to his feet, rapier in hand. He stabbed out at the nearest fuzzy limb, the needle-sharp steel sinking easily into the rabbit's flesh. However, what would have been a mortal wound to any normal critter was easily shrugged off as but a minor pricking by the lop-eared beast, who responded by sweeping out a gargantuan arc with a similarly sized fist. Lokki barely dived away in time. He swapped out the blade for a crossbow and fired a bolt at the creature's eye, but it was no good: the shot fell short of the rabbit's immense height and the arrow clattered ineffectually to the ground.

Lokki pondered how to defeat the beast. It would require cunning, resource, ingenuity... and a very large carrot. By some bizarre twist of fate, he happened to have just such a thing.

He reached down into his pockets and grabbed hold of the end of something rough, thin and conical. He pulled out what at first seemed to be just your average orange root vegetable, but Lokki kept pulling and pulling and it got bigger and longer until after a few minutes Lokki appeared to have produced a massive carrot several times his own height from an apparently ordinary pocket.

"Dude," duded Geo, "What the f**k? Why the hell are you carrying around a huge f**king carrot for?"

"Won it at the county fair last week," answered Lokki. "Just couldn't figure out what the bloody hell to use it for."

Lokki let the carrot drop to the ground (it was very heavy, after all) with a thunderous thud. "Oi flopsy!" he yelled in the general direction of the monster, "Want some of this?"

The rabbit froze and turned to slaver at Lokki's enormous vegetable. It bounded over and scooped it up with alarming speed, but not before Lokki had a chance to grab ahold of the leaves. The beast reared itself to its full height and held its possessions aloft with a triumphant roar. Lokki quickly took aim at the monster bunny's eye, but had another idea. He let off a shot at the underside of the truck that the rabbit was holding, then leapt to the ground.

Time seemed to slow as the bolt arced gracefully through the air and embedded itself in the vehicle's fuel tank. There was an instantaneous silence, then the cheese truck exploded in a massive, smoking fireball.

"That... that doesn't seem physically possible!" commented Goldstein.

OOC:
I would just like to take this oppertunity to anounce
but Lokki kept pulling and pulling and it got bigger and longer
That's what she said.

A smoking crater was in the place of what was once a vertically-triumphant rabbit. As the smoke blew away in the wind, a man stood upright in the crater.
The man was bald, had a big, brown beard/mustache combo going on every which-way on his face, wore tattered clothes, and carried a musket with a large, cone-like end.
"Nooo!" he screamed to the treetops. "Robo-Rabbit 9000!"
The four giant-rabbit-slayers stared at the man in confusion.
"Robo-Rabbit 9000?" Lokki asked. "Now what the devil is that supposed to be?"
The man looked at Lokki. "Gather round, ye fellows, and lend an ear to me long, boring tale!"
Goldstein, not into story time, pulled an excuse out of his hindquarters. "We've really got places to go-"
"And now begins my long, boring tale!" announced the musket man. "I came to this island long ago- twenty minutes, maybe- to wander around pointlessly, and I perchanced upon a buried treasure! Aye, this treasure could last me for months, perhaps years, since I'm such a penny-pincher! That's what I thought to meself."
The four heroes' eyes widened. "You found treasure?" Trudi asked.
"I'M TELLING A MOTHER*ING STORY SO SHUT THE * UP!" shouted the bearded one. "So, I found this tresure, but I soon learned that the island was not deserted, even though me map said that deserted it be! On this island be a great evil!"
"What evil may this be, my good fellow?" queried Lokki.
Trudi shook her head. "No, wait, what about the treas-"
"This horrible evil takes helpless, innocent animals and turns them into red-eyed, blood-thirsty beings wearing various articles of clothing!"
Geo stared intently at nothing and, in all seriousness he said, "That's messed up."
"So, I built Robo-Rabbit 9000 to protect me from the evil powers of evil. And now ye've gone and destroyed me Robo-Rabbit!"
"Wait, you found buried treasure, learned of an unspeakable evil, and built a mechanized rabbit, all in twenty minutes?" Goldstein asked in disbelief.
"Yep!" said the nameless fellow that supposedly had no name as he had failed to mention it in any previous moment. "Oh, by the way, m'names Poobeard. I might've been mentioning it befer', but it didn't seem to be much on the relevant side at any particular moment."
"Why was the rabbit carrying a cheese truck?" Geo asked.
"Oh, that. A part of the treasure I found included a truck full o' cheese. I can't imagine why someone would be burying a truck full o' cheese. I'd imagine some idiot did it. But there ya' go."

(OOC sorry Schippywhajig, but there isn't supposed to be anyone new joining any more =( So I'll have to carry on from before. Sorry)

Trudi clutched her head. Man, she should learn to dodge quicker.
"Maaaan, my head hurts!!!" she exclaimed.

She then looked over herself, then everyone else.

Mmm, everything was covered with meat and veg. And cheese. She picked up a little cheese and tasted it. Mmm, Farmer Freds Cheddar Cheese. 1 year, 34 days, 23 hours, 15 minutes, and 2 -wait- three seconds old. To be rough.

Then she spotted a large X, 50 foot by 50 foot, on the ground where the rabbit was standing.

"LOOK!!!"

The others were looking already, she really didn't need to shout it out.

Annoyed, she thumped Goldstein then began digging.

Lokki and Geo shrugged and joined in. Goldstein claimed that his shoulder was hurt so badly from the thump that he couldn't dig, and would be claiming compensation.

Finally they hit something. Lokki and Geo heaved out a large trunk. Geo then smashed the padlock and opened it.

Inside lay a dress. They stared at it in disbeleif.

"Er I can explain that, see" came a voice from above. They looked up.

Fishears stared back down at them, looking rather sheepish.

"How? This is quite clearly a dress, and the fact that you are floating above us makes it clear that it is yours" Lokki said stiffly, trying to hide a smirk.

"Erm, yer see, me er... WIFE, yesh, me wife, it's hers see"

The others shook their heads in disbeleif. Trudi pulled out a pair of shoes and earrings from the trunk and raised her eyebrows.

"I'd really appretiate it if yer didn't tell any'ne this, me maties" Fishears said quietly, wringing his hands.

"What's in it for us?" Goldstien piped up, looking greedily at the ghostly seaman.

No more new people? I missed that part.

Quote:

---

OOC: Awesome work, people, good to see such fun posts and good imagination throughout.

Okay, now I'm gonna close this RP for newcomers. We've got enough people in this now, if there's anymore then it'll get needlessly hectic and an ass sore to deal with.

Anyway, this might be helpful, having a list of RPers and their characters:

Pachamac- Pach, Captain Fishears; Trudi; Deck; Cy- Ori; THS; SL- Arista; OTB-Aiden; Nutch- Lok; Bat-Goldstein; Geo; and tentatively HSW and Creo.

---

2nd page, 2nd post. Sorry Pregga.

Okay.

"Alright, I know what to do." Aidan picked up a thick branch, and tied his compass to it via a chain. Which now made made it a very effective mace,

"IT'S MACIN' TIME!" he shouted and began swinging it around, thus sending all the flesh eating monkey things airborne that it caught in it's path.

"I bet the other group is having more fun than we are at the moment" he said, before looking around and seeing a monstrous bunny rabbit overlooking the way the other group took.

"Dammit! I would have took on a giant rabbit over a hoarde of evil monkeys anyday! I mean, how tough could a rabbit be, regardless of its size?"

THS, funilly enough, was rather enjoying himself. As of yet he didn't have to do any work - everyone else seemed to be doing the fighting for him, so he just managed to get a relaxing spot leant by a tree. Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for...

He was distracted from this little tune when he noticed a small ball of brown fur flying towards him at a frightful velocity. On closer inspection - very fast inspection, as if it was any slower it wouldn't even be able to happen - it turned out to be one of the blood-craving monkeys that up until now had been so kindly ignoring him. To say he panicked would be an understatement.

Thankfully, his prayers - or so called, more random wishing interspersed with the occasional string of swear words - were answered, as a large lump of melted cheese flew threw the air and colliding neatly with the flying ape, hurling it to the ground and trapping it under quickly solidifying, industrial strength cheese (the type that can be seen in nacho machines in parts of the Caribbean). The pirate sighed, guessed that had a million to one chance of occuring and so would have happened nine times out of ten (this is a reference! Aren't I cunning.).

Now that this immediate threat had been elimated, he leant back against the tree trunk and closed his eyes in rest.

Thankfully he never saw the chunk of rabbit meat that hit him in the skull and knocked him to the ground.

Team Badass

Amongst the various methods of fighting employed by his esteemed crew members, such as the particular mace wielding, tray slamming and lazy dodging, Pach himself used a somewhat unorthodox method of fighting his fingers. As monkeys flew past him at all angles, he would swing by, quickly jab them and stab them or poke them in the eyes which left the noisy little beggars blind for a while. Didnt stop the god awful screaming though.

More of the monkeys were defeated by the odd miscellaneous shrapnel that flew from almost the other side of the island where a freshly exploded rabbit was. After a few minutes of total carnage, the remaining monkeys stopped and looked around themselves, a slight instance of sanity within their minds. Checking their surroundings, they clearly saw a grove of blood splattered and injured monkeys strewn about. Quitting the fight and taking their chances, they ran off back into the jungle, carrying as many of their fallen monkey comrades as possible.

Thank god we got rid of those noisy gits, Aiden said aloud.

What should we do next? Keep searching for the treasure and Fishears? Deck asked.

Yes. I say we head on over to where that explosion was. Its not normal that you get flying pieces of meat and metal raining down on you we should check it out, and see if it had anything to do with the others. Replied Pach, picking up a slice of rabbit meat and inspecting it.

Hey. Hey Pach! Look! THS is knocked out! Deck shouted aloud, pointing to the lying body of their comrade.

Oh, for crying out loud Pach muttered, walking towards THS to inspect him.

Team Lager

Fishears sighed in response to Goldsteins question. It was pretty much obvious that this band of pirates cared for one thing and one thing only: themselves. Of course, they had only just met, but they needed to band together to be a team and care for each other, else theyd just die in the upcoming travels.

Still, this group had by the most promise of all the crews he had served with. They were unpredictable and yet strangely resourceful Fishears knew that itd only be this kind of band of people whom would carry around a 100ft carrot just for the kind of emergency as a 100ft, cheese truck wielding rabbit. Quite.

Whats in it for you, goat? Fishears spoke back up. Well, if you dont tell anyone about this here dress, see, then Ill make sure we dont just keep you as emergency food rationin okay?

Goldstein paled, and then became slightly angry, but didnt know what to say.

Anyway, put the dress back intee the chest and we can keep going on to find the real treasure on the island, mee ol crews deposited gold. Come along Fishears said, walking off in a particular direction, as if he actually knew where he was going this time.

Hold on, fishy, Geo said aloud. You said what would be in it for Goldstein, but not for us, mang,

Fishears sighed, as his ghost hovered above the ground. Nothin, I have nothin to give anymore but information. Im dead, thus have nothinto give hold on. I tell ye what. If were able to get the chest before the other group, then you can keep to yourselves your own personal share. That is, if we get hurrying.

The group pondered for a while, then nodded, discarding the dress into the chest and quickly closing it before hurrying after Fishears in their continuing search for the gold filled treasure chest in this madcap island.

Trudi paled as the group followed Fishears more eagerly than before. Keep a portion for themselves? The thought just didn't add up in her mind.

She could go back and tell the others. But Fishears obviously knew where he was going, and at any rate if she split up with them she probably wouldn't even find her way back, let alone know where they were going.

Biting her lip, she hurried forwards to catch up with the others.

Maybe if there was some way to leave a message?

No, she didn't know how. She looked back at the rabbit remains, which was dissapearing from sight.

They're trying to get the treasure for themselves... selfish buggers

She closed her eyes. Really, she wanted to shout at them, but she came to no other conclusion.

Composing herself, the ran forwards to where Fishears was.

Little did she know that someone had indeed received her mental message, although he did not respond due to being slumped on the floor by a tree, unconcious after being hit by rabbit debris.

"How are we gonna wake THS up?" asked Deck

"I could mace him I guess" Aidan replied

"No macing" Pach said, pointing his finger sternly at Aidan

"aww"

"...Well, if he ain't gonna wake up, I guess one of us will have to carry him" Pach continued.

They all looked away from each other, none of them willing to do any manual labour.

"I have another idea," suggested Deckman. He walked over to where THS was lying and kneeled down.

"Rum and coke," he said, and he snapped his fingers. It worked.

"GO FRANCE!" THS yelled deliriously. He woke up instantly and took a moment to regain his composure. "So, what did I miss?" he asked, rubbing his skull irritably.

"Not much," Aidan replied. "You just got knocked out a couple of minutes ago when you got hit in the head with a..err.."

"Nevermind that," Deck interrupted hastily, pulling THS to his feet. "Come on, let's look somewhere else."

"But why is the rum gone?"

THS was dragged along as he stumbled through the unnaturally silent forest. The word was slowly deciding that being blurry was too much hard work with too little return, and so was starting to focus itself again. If it weren't for the fact that he couldn't hold a thought for much longer than a few seconds, THS probably would have thanked it. When he looked back at the whole ordeal he was grateful he hadn't - it was bad enough being awoken by your team mates, let alone putting the icing on the cake and acting mad as well. He presumed he did this anyway, in fact, but best not to make things all too prominent.

Slowly but surely, however, he returned to normality, and eventually could walk unaided, albeit repeatedly tripping over regularly over objects notably smaller than a ping-pong ball. This wasn't turning out to be a good trip.

For some reason, though, he felt like they were heading the wrong way. It was as though something foreign had been put in his head and was telling him something was wrong.* Ignoring it only seemed to make it more prominent, while acknowledging it only made it more prominent at a faster rate. Eventually he decided to speak his mind.

"I think we're going the wrong way," he said, showing just how little his mind had in it.

Deck sighed. "Listen, if you're just going to trick us into going back to the ship for more rum now that you've had some, you're not fooling us."

"No, seriously, I really think this isn't the right direction. It feels more like we should be going..."

He turned about slowly. Which way did it feel like they should be going? He concentrated, then finally decided.

"This wa--"

Inexplicably, and in defiance to all spacial probability, a log of unknown but probably fuel-tank based origins fell from seemingly nowhere and collided with the side of THS' head, leaving no visible injuries but again knocking him unconcious. Speculation is that knowing why this happened will produce a lot of scientific advances, but when scientists are asked they merely shrug it off with the word 'karma', and continue on with something important such as a formula that links the amount of TV someone watches with the amount of times they complain about the weather per day.

*This has, actually, happened to him before - under the influence of the Cravation Brain Parasite, he eventually ended up running naked through crowded night life. Unfortunately, at the time, he was also under the influence of alcohol, which ironically enough disintergrates said parasite, and therefore left no trace of its existance, and so he was promptly arrested. However, at the trial he was let off, against all evidence, by the judge to return to his life of piracy. It was later discovered that the judge was also suffering from said parasite infestation, and if Pach had known of this great injustice in the criminal system, he would surely have frowned. >=/

OOC: Yes I've knocked him out again 😯 Reason being I'm heading on holiday for a week, so I thought it would be a good excuse not to involve my character for that amount of time. If anyone wants to get him going again feel free, but within reason. Hopefully I've advanced this half of the story to a degree o.o

OOC: I wrote this way too late at night. D:

Team Badass

Pach just stared at THS unconscious body, waiting for the guy to get back up. But, regardless, he stayed just as he was the bugger. >=(

Hey, THS? Pach hesitated, still not quite sure of his name. get up, man. We dont want to have to carry you around this island and fight demonic wildlife along the way.

Still, nothing from the fallen bloke.

Deck, carry him, Pach said, before starting to walk off in the direction THS had suggested.

What?! Keep me a break, mang, Im not carrying him. Deck earnestly shouted. Pach turned to look at him, glaring, and waiting for Deck to retract on his statement, but nothing. Didnt Fishears place him as charge of this crew? After all, he was the one with the map, surely they should be listening to him

Okay, tell you what. Well draw sticks, okay? Pach said, bending over and picking some scattered sticks off the floor, all of which were more or less equal width, and held them stuck in his hand, so the other two wouldnt be able to tell which was the shortest. Okay then, pick a stick each. Pach said.

First, Deck picked a stick, retracting it to find it would have been the longest one. Heck yeah! Deck shouted. Next, Aiden pulled his own stick out; it would have been the middle one. Then, Pach opened his palm, and found out that he held the shortest stick.

Okay, Deck, looks like youre carrying him, Pach said, turning around again and moving on in the direction THS specified.

Whaaaaaaaaaattttttt?! Deck quite exaggeratedly shouted, pursing his lips together. I got the longest stick! Thus, I clearly

lose. Pach said, matter of factly. He then shrugged his shoulders and shook his head from side to side, his magnificent hair billowing in the wind. I never said which stick would be the loser stick. Where I come from, we played that the longest stick loses.

We come from the same place! Deck cried.

Yeah, well, lets just get going, okay? Pach said, picking his nose and then flinging the booger away. We havent got much time. Aiden nodded and chuckled, following after him with deck picking up THS and mumbling and grumbling along the way, dragging him behind him by the feet. Needless to say, the terrain wasnt smooth at all so THS head was getting a pounding by all the odd stones scattered about.

He was gonna have one hell of a hangover.

Team Lager

The team of five moved on across the island, following Capn Fishears lead as they struggled onwards, tirelessly, just to find this treasure chest of gold that would support them on their voyage.

They emerged from the foliage, and beyond them was a vast plain which became gradually steeper and steeper before it came across over a cliff. The surrounding sea was clearly visible, and the sun was bright and in their faces: it would soon be setting, and staying on this island of demonic monkeys and 100ft giant rabbits at nighttimes would not be a wise idea.

So. Began Lokki. Captain? Does this place look at all memorable to you for when you last came here?

The ghost raced a grey hand to his chin in consideration, but given his corporeal form, the hand just passed through his chin. This made him look like a plonker, actually.

Yarr it does seem to be a bit familiar, me thinks Fishears replied.

Hmm, Lokki pondered, searching around the area whilst the others did the same. Tactically, it makes pretty good sense. Itd be easy to dig out of if you knew it was here, but rival pirates wouldnt be able to anchor right next to it thanks to those cliffs. Youd need to anchor around and go all this way to the other side Im not sure many pirates would do that.

Fishears looked at him, nodding.

Still, that said, Im not sure if even youre uh, capable pirates would have thought to do that. Or would have even been in the state of mind to do so. Lokki added.

Yarr, dont doubt me, me boy. If I wasnt a sharp and smart captain, my ghost wouldnt still be here, would it? It would have passed on like almost all other spirits Fishears quite smugly said, pressing out his chest.

If you were a sharp and smart captain, you wouldnt have been killed. Lokki said, staring blankly at Fishears with a matter of factly expression.

Hey, I smell something! Goldstein shouted. I think this is it!

smelled? Fishears asked aloud.

Well, yeah, yknow. Im a goat. And this is a gold. course I can smell it, pfft. Goldstein remarked.

Geo remained silent in the corner, smoking a spliff.

As the group pressed their heads forwards to examine the ground, they saw what Goldsteins amazing gold smelling abilities came down to: a patch of dead grass obviously killed by weedkiller amongst more fertile grass, which deliberately spelled out Capn Fishears is a wanker. Hmp. Typical.

Well, this be eet, all right. Fishears said aloud, smiling. My old crew had one hell of a sense of humour, to mark the spot like this! The rest just looked speechless to him. Anyway, dig it up!

dig it up? Youve found it? came an unexpected voice from behind them. Team Lager all turned around in unison (apart from Geo, who was too far out to care), to find, newly emerging from the foliage in a different corner to where they came from; the four members of Team Badass. Pach and Aiden looked quite cool and relaxed, but Deck was knackered from carrying THS and fell down to catch his breath. THS fell on top of him. This is the treasure? Pach asked.

"Aye, it be the treasure" Fishears said with considerable smugness

Trudi felt exctasy, releif, worry and beiweilderment sweep over herself all at once, leading to her supporting a very strange expression indeed. How did they know where they were?
Oh, she didn't care, they'd found the treasure in a way that meant that no-one would hog much of it.

"How'd you know we were here?" she asked Pach loudly as various other members of the amature pirating crew got out their shovels and spades, leaving THS lying face down on the grass.

"THS went all delerious and started talking about us going in the wrong directing before he had his little... accident. Thought we might as well chase it up anyway" Pach shrugged. He looked over the other members of the crew. "C'mon! Can't you dig faster?"

"Do it yerself, you idiot" someone yelled back.

Pach ignored this blow to his authority just like the many times before. Everyone knew he wasn't a natural leader.

"Trudi go dig"

Trudi frowned at him and picked up her shovel with the air of someone about to crack your skull open with a patucularly blunt and rusty axe, but began digging anyway.

The majority of the crew stood digging in the single spot, the only exceptions being THS, who was unconscious, Deck, who was knackered, Pach and Fishears, who were inspecting the map, and Geo, who still stood dazed whilst smoking.

In no time at all with the combined groups effort, a shovel crashed against something hard and solid. Feverishly digging the rest of it out, the crew finally unearthed the treasure chest.

Yar, at last! Fishears cried, looking at the large, sizeable treasure chest and nodding proudly. Well, we better be getting it open.

Hey, hang on, look, Goldstein pointed with a furry hoof. This chest has a key hole. Do you have the key?

Of course I have the key, silly goat Fishears send, searching his body, before realising that, as a ghost, he was unable to actually pick anything up. Its left in my dead body! he exclaimed.

The crew all sighed in sadness.

Chaps, if we just employed a large enough amount of force onto the chest, we should be able to splinter and force the chest open. Lokki said, matter of factly. The crews spirits were relifted.

Well, what force should we use? asked Aidan. He looked out to the edge of the cliff. The only thing I can think off is chucking it over there, but thats hardly helping.

We just need someone with a hard enough head, of course, interrupted Deck, carrying THSs body to the chest, and before anyone could interrupt, he smacked THSs head hard into the lock and shattering it. The impact rudely woke THS up.
Serves you right for making me have to carry you, you lazy git.

Pach knelt down, and lifted the treasure chests top up, a bright light erupting from the chest and momentarily blinding everyone in a brilliant flash. In moments, the light died out, and as the crews eyesight returned to them, they all gasped in shock at the contents of the treasure chest.

It was another bloody treasure chest. A smaller one, fit inside the one they just opened.

Youve got to be kidding me, Pach said.

Well, all you need is someone with a hard eno- Deck began, before THS quite earnestly shouted out No!.

Well, I guess all we need to do is hit this chest with some more force and open it up? Pach suggested.

But before the crew could embark on opening the second chest, a loud roar escaped from the foliage behind them. As they all turned to its direction, they saw a multitude of birds escaping from the canopy in fear. But still, they could not see what exactly there was in the darkness coming towards them. They all stood, hesitantly and stiff, with great expectation (of course, bar Geo, who seemed oblivious to anything around him).

YOU KILLED MY BRUDDAH! came a loud, booming voice, before the figure it belonged to came crashing through into the clearing, bring down many trees in its way. Just like what Team Lager had fought before, now in front of them was another 100ft giant rabbit, this one more leaner and meaner then before. Surrounding its feet was the collection of monkeys they had fought before, this time rolling around in transparent balls.

Echoing the whole crews thoughts were Geos own words: What the hell? Im seeing one huge rabbit and crazy fire ass monkeys, dudes. Have I been smoking too much? he then looked down at the spliff, then took another drag, whilst the rest of the crew tried to think of someway out of the situation.

Trudi stared at the new apperation.

Fire Ass Monkeys...

She whipped out a set of paints from her bag which was not there before. Selecting a couple of paints, she smirked.

She charged forwards, and swiped her painbrush at the nearest ball. With a few strokes, the ball was painted red and the top, and white at the bottom.

The monkey inside realised in horror what had happened, and ran off as fast as it could to the rearest cliff, where it committed suicide with the sheer horror of it all.

It was not turning out to be a good day.

After being knocked unconcious twice, being used as a blunt object and having a blinding headache, a giant rabbit and a bunch of monkey balls did not seem to him to be a reasonable form of recovery. He sought wildly for cover enough to at very least protect himself from further concussion, but all that was available was the forest, which was now cut off by hoards of rolling monkeys and, worse, a massive garden pet. Had he not been concerned for his own safety, he would have wondered aloud where these things came from, and how they had managed to miss sighting a pair of 100 foot-tall rabbits on their way on to the island.

Regardless, he considered diving to the ground anyway, seeing as cowardice could perhaps do him more good than ignorace. His plan was spoilt, however, by the sudden appearance of a monkey who had somehow propelled himself into the air at alarming speed towards THS' head. Needless to say, the fox's pants nearly turned to a very interesting shade of brown (if such things float your boat, at least) and his entire life flashed before his eyes (he was later quoted as stating that it was "Boring enough the first time around".).

Thankfully, due to a fluke in the nature of life-flashing, since this wasn't the moment where he was to die - in fact, it was quite a way off - there was a lot of left over time where he saw exactly what was happening at the moment in time, but at a much slower rate - think Bullet Time but less spinning around. Realising this, he smirked (or would have, if the passage of time hadn't slowed his movement to the point where chronology gets a bit fuzzy), and moved out the way of the oncoming primate.

It quickly occured to him that this lacked a certain amount of flair, and that he had some image problems to work through after the multiple incidents involving the state of his conciousness. As the monkey passed through where THS had been standing, he pushed off one foot and shoulder barged the creature's casing, rocketing it from the clifftop. As time returned to normal, the fox was grateful to have gone an entire post without losing conciousness.

Annoyed by the fact that the monkeys Trudi had painted couldn't see where they were going, leading to the success rate of suicidal monkeys being low, she gave up this tactic. Carefully she put her paints away, ducking down absent mindedly as a monkey flew over her head.

Standing up straight again, she faced the nearest monkey, and got into a fighting stance.

It shot towards her at an alarming speed, and she threw herself to the floor instead.

It shot right past her, barely missing her.

She sighed, and proceded to stand up again, when the floor suddenly gave way below her and she found herself shooting down a large slide.

Various members of the crew continued their unorthodox battle against the balled simians and towering rabbit, only to find it to be an incredibly tedious task of continuingly trying to avoid being run over or actually squashed.

Pach weaved forwards and backwards, narrowly missing each rolling ball and trying to pierce the transparent sphere with his own attacks, but to no avail. Whilst he concentrated on dodging the hordes of rapidly passing super monkey balls, he failed to notice the towering rabbit swiftly moving towards him (how you can miss him is a mystery of life). In a sudden realization, Pach turned, but was too late as a swift kick from the rabbit punted Pach a large distance away, and off the cliff altogether, before disappearing from sight into the sea a short distance away from the island.

The rabbits heavy movements had upset and unbalanced the island. The ground quaked and ruptured, splitting apart, with the rabbit and monkeys being thrown one side and the crew the other way. Whilst the vicious natives of the islands went tumbling to the jagged rocks at the bottom of the cliff, the rest of the crew fell towards the island itself and into the ground, crashing on several slides imbedded in the ground and sliding down them.

Captain Fishears stood, or rather, hovered in the air as the ground beneath him vanished. The plain was long gone, most of it into the sea nearby with the drowning monkeys and giant rabbit, whilst the crew disappeared from sight by the slides towards the centre of the island. The captain was unsure how to react to it all. Who would he follow and check up on? Pach, who had been thrown into the ocean a good while away whilst holding the treasure chest, or the rabble band of pirates who were now somewhere stuck in the heart of this island?

He turned, eventually deciding upon following the rest of the crew it made the most sense. There was more of them, and itd suit well to help out the majority, especially one as leaderless and misshapen as they. As for Pachamac and the treasure, well, he could only hope

Minutes passed, before the crew finally landed at the bottom of the spiralling and sprawling slides, feeling as though they had just been treated to a rollercoaster through the inside of the island. As they came to a crash and heap at the bottom, they could only wonder to themselves (and for some, with large profanities) where the hell they were and how to get out. A short time later, the familiar figure of Captain Fishears phased through the walls, his corporeal form not barred by the physical limitations of the rock.

Well, we be in a pickle, yar? Fishears said aloud, inspecting the spacious cavern. I doubt ye could climb back up those there stairs, wed need to find another exit. Come along, I dread to fear what might be down here With this, Fishears began to float forward.

Trudi was sliding down her slide quite happily (she had been sliding for a while and had got quite used to it) when what seemed like a massive earthquake shook her silly. She screamed as the slide seemed to tip the other way, back the way she came from...

Woah, the rabbit and monkey balls were there.

She span herself round and dug her nails as hard as she could into the top of the slide and ground to a halt. She looked down to find the slide was cracked in places, leading to what seemed like a great gaping hole. In the other direction she heard a small splash accompanied by a yell, followed by several other small splashes then a much larger splash.

She swore loudly, her voice echoing through both ends of the slide, then began clawing her way through the slide in the direction it was going in the first place. At least if she got to the coast, judging by the sounds, she could reach the ship.

[edit] (OOC) bored of waiting, so yeah. Carrying on.

(IC) She caried on clawing her way when she saw light. It was dimming, which ment it was getting dark.
She swore.
She reached the end of the tunnel, and looked down.
There was a sheer drop, and she found that the tunnel was halfway up a cliff. The sea was red and bits of plastic and meat were floating in it.
Hmmm, soup.
She then realised that there was no way she could jump into the sea from here, as there were rocks everywhere.
She looked back down the slide for a moment. Should she go back to the others?
Maybe they've gone already.
No, not yet. They wouldn't have gone yet.
She shook her head for a moment, to get the wierd buzzing out.
She decided to climb down the cliff instead.
She had just reached hanging from the hole in the cliff when a peice of rock slided sideways.
"LOL" said the screen underneath.
"WTF" she shouted back, only not using the acronym.
"Smartypants" it said back
"WHAAAAAAAAAT"
"LOL"
She scowled at it
"}:O" it said back
Caught by surprise, she stared.
"O.O"
A massive platform on a spring lashed out, catapulting her backwards, past the rocks, and into the ocean.

She hit the water, and scowled. Damn boobytraps. Just wait til she went back to that screen and bashed it's pixels out...
Something floated past.
It was the treasure.
She struggled towards it, but noticed that she was moving away rather than forwards.
Suddenly she was sucked underwater with the speed of a bullet, through a wierd passageway under the island, then popped out of a hole in the roof of the passage like a cork out of a bottle.
She landed on the floor spluttering and coughing, soaking wet, to find the rest of the group staring at her with a mixture of suprise and disbeleif, except Geo who shrugged.
She then took in her surroundings.
"Where's the rabbit?!!"
"Dunno" Deck replied.
She stood for a moment, mesmerised by the sheer size of the lump accumilating on THS' head, before tearing her eyes away and taking in the less obvious option.
"Where the hell are we?!"
"Centre of t'island, me kipper" Fishears said, smirking at her.
She stared at THS' head again, who seemed to be getting a little self concious at being stared at when he wasn't actually making a fool of himself.

IC:
Three days had passed since the newly assembled pirate crew had come together in a search for fame and fortune. Three days now they had been trapped in this infuriating network of caves within the depths of the island. Every turn they had made seemed to be pointless, and no matter what they had tried, they always arrived at the exact same point in which they arrived at. It was like every single direction leaving this area would just circle back to it, but, try for all the groups might, they couldnt fathom an exit out at all. It was too dark to ever get their bearings in the narrow tunnels until they arrived back where they started.

Now, all of them were simply sitting down, conserving their energy and wondering what the hell to do to get out of their prison. They all assumed that their designated captain, Pach, who had been thrown into the sea was dead, and that those who were in charge of looking after the ship, Ori and Arista, had probably sailed off by now. Typical.

The crew were nearly all silent the entire time. They didnt really know each other and they didnt particularly care. In fact, for them, they were growing to become more and more hungry. And well, cannibalism didnt seem like such a bad prospect

Damn, this maze is infuriating! screamed out one of them, trying to establish some sort of conversation. Hopefully, the group could pitch in and finally figure a way out of the tunnels. Captain Fishears just looked at the individual quietly, nodding to himself.

THS was nursing his thump upon his head. It was hurting less now, after the three days, but he still had a banging headache. Oi, you. He said, addressing Fishears. You can pass through walls. Surely youd be able to find an exit, or at least the weakest spot to get out that we could, I dunno, pound our way through?

The ghost sighed, before hovering up. Thats true, ayep. I was hoping though, laddies, that youd be able to overcome our predicament yeeselves, but apparently not. Fishears explained.

Nutchos winched. You mean, old chap, that there is a means of escaping our confinement?

Theres always a solution to every problem, yknow. Fishears shouted. Youre all resourceful, ymight have figured it out yeeselves. But I guess this time Ill get us out of here.

Fishears hovered up and to a nearby wall, pointing to it. This used to be a pirates headquarters, yknow. Of course, all the treasure in here has already been plundered before by well, meself. Anyway, this is a secret compartment. These outjutting rocks here can be moved leading to tunnel to a dock.

A dock? Trudi asked.

Aye, where one of the old pirates ships are located. Theres a secret tunnel there which leads to outside. Fishears declared.

You sod, you should have told us sooner! Trudi shouted, trying to bonk the captain on the head, but failing as her fist passed straight through. Her point was still made, though.

The group hurriedly pushed the rocks in front of the tunnel to the side, and then ran through the tunnel, before stopping suddenly in surprise to see such a large dock carved out within the island. Before them was a large, if slightly dilapidated ship. Its sails had tremendous holes within them.

Hey, Deck spoke aloud. Does this mean were gonna have to use this ship from now on? Despite all the time we wasted blinging your ship? What about the supplies we had?

I dont know, Im afraid, me hearties. Fishears confessed. To be honest, this ships almost falling apart. Itll only get us to the next port. I dont think me ship will still be docked here but it might be at the next port?

Talk about a wasted adventure Aidan commented, as they climbed up the walkway onto the ship, and started making preparations. We waste our time finding mad monkeys and rabbits, getting lost, losing our ship and three of our crewmates, and not even finding the treasure to boot!

Ah, tis a pirates life Fishears said. Its tough. Now you can all see how tough this adventure can be, correct? The ghost smiled.

The ship slowly began to set off from the dock without incident. Luckily, none of the monkeys had discovered this base or were there to interrupt the ships cast off. As the old ship exited a small tunnel cave, the crew sailed around to where they had originally docked, and true enough, their original ship was missing.

Here ye all, Fishears spoke. Well be sailing this here raft to the next port on our destination. Yeeve all seen how difficult being a pirate can be and in comparison to what we usually face, that was a cakewalk. If ye still fancy yer sights on treasure, then say so now to join me. If you value your lives more, then well drop yee off at the next port and say our goodbyes. The ship rocked to the waves, their next destination and port of call nearing. It was a bustling seaside town, just what they needed to either find new supplies, their ship, or even new crewmates.

Well? Fishears reiterated. Who of ye will be staying, and wholl be going?

OOC: Alrighty then, I'm reviving this RP. It's had a lot of potential, and I think the issue that marred this RP is due to not everyone who initially joined still contributing to. As such, this post helps to clean up the last story arc and determine who's still in and not. After that, we'll begin the next part of our voyage, and depending on numbers of who's in it or not, we'll see if people can maybe introduce a second character, or we'll advertise for other people to join.

THS smirked and looked around hastily at the crew. Of course he was staying in. It was either that, or go back to Espoir Gauche and be an assistant detective again. Or worse, work at the Jolly Roger's Burger Bar...he shuddered visibly, which, considering he was a bit wet from an incident involving a loose plank on the jetty to the 'new' ship, caused a few people to recoil away from him for fear of being splashed.

"I'm in," he proclaimed loudly, before turning on his heel and heading into the captain's quarters. Most of the crew watched him close the doors behind him, then glanced back round to Fishears, he stared bemusedly at the doors, before floating forwards and passing through them.

As he floated into the room, he saw THS sat with his feet upon the desk looking at him. "Hello, Fishears," he said, before the rotting desk finally gave way and caused the fox into a misbalance and making him fall off the chair, from which he quickly recovered and stood up as though nothing had happened. "What do you think of me being the new captain, seeing as old foxboy's disappeared?"

Fishears stared at him levelly, then sighed, which is very difficult to do for someone with no physical lungs, so in an ideal world he deserved some credit. "First of all, it's up to me to decide who the captain is. Secondly, you have no experience that I know of of captaining a ship. Lastly, you happen to be a fox as well, if you didn't notice."

THS smiled. "Tell me, have you ever heard of Captain THS?"

Fishears looked thoughtful for a moment, then a look of realisation appeared on his face. "You mean the pirate who ran around naked at the Porta Cravatia, collapsed in a flower pot singing 'Rain, rain, go away' because people kept spitting on him and eventually got away with it, despite going to court?"

THS stared blankly at him. "I'll just...go back and join the crew, shall I?" he stuttered.

"I think that would be best, yeah," Fishears agreed, following THS back out onto the deck (Not to be confused with Deck, as being stood on by both Fishears and THS would be unpleasant for him.).

Of course, at this point Trudi was actually sitting on Deck, who had stolen her last polo and had lived to regret it. She had become rather bored with the dock by now, and was impatient to move on. She sat there, scratching away at the deck which wasn't Deck, as she'd already finished with him.
"Well are we gonna get a move on?" she huffed impatiently, as her scratches formed a P on the wooden surface. Slowly, more letters formed.
"What the hell is that saying? Post-menstrual tension?" Deck frowned at the letters.
"NO!" Trudi screamed, kicking him in the shin. "How the hell does that look like an M?!"
"Easily" he groaned
"IT'S A F AND A L"
"You need writing lessons."
Trudi proceeded to twist Deck's arm behind his back.

OOC: When you start calling for cast, count me in =D

"I'm still in" said Aidan. "I'm sure as hell not letting you lot get my share of the loot" he smirked, as the town began to draw closer and closer into view.

He looked around the deck, trying to see if he could find a certain peice of equipment.

"Say, does anyone know where the anchor is?"

Everyone else glanced around the deck.

"Err..."

"Well..."

"Maybe it's..."

"...Bollocks." Aidan muttered

All of a sudden, Lokki, who had gone for a quick swim while no-one was looking, was swept out to sea by a freak anomaly of current and swallowed whole by a passing basking shark, which - being designed for eating krill and plankton and other such small things - promptly choked to death and, due to the the extra weight, sank to a watery grave, dragging Lokki down with it.

OOC: Sorry guys, but whilst I might be able to guarantee activity during the holidays, I don't reckon I'll have time during term time, so I'm going to have to give up on this one. Oh well, so much for this being the first RP I actually saw through to completion.

Goldstein sat on his haunches, contemplating his next move.
On the one hand, he felt nothing but complete and utter scorn for his crewmates and the voyage thus far had been an absolute disaster. In fact, Gopldstein would have gone so far as to call it a trainwreck if trains had even been invented by this time, which as the author understands had not.

On the other hand, however, was the crushing ennui of living in Espoir Gauche and making money by doing tricks (Such as talking, because talking is a trick if you're a mountain goat) for gold coins, which he promptly spent on trying to drink enough liquor to forget that he was, in fact, an immortal mountain goat.

In the end, he decided that the possible payout of whatever treasure might possibly exist was infinitely higher than living for the rest of eternity in a one-horse port town, and expressed his desire to remain upon the ship.

OOC: Alright, now that the role calls done we can continue on with the RP beginning at the new dock. The cast of people still continuing on with this RP is as follows:
Myself (Capn Fishears), THS (as himself), Trudi (as herself), Bat (Goldstein), Blu (Aidan), Deck (as himself), and Crimjims, as whoever he wishes to be.

The numbers now are far more manageable than before as Im sure youll agree and itll make things easier to understand. Now that the number of RPers is smaller, I think it should be okay to allow you to introduce a second character if you so wish, but again its up to you.

IC:
Fishears nodded at all of the individuals requests to either stay or depart (well, to be honest, it wasnt so much a reply saying they wanted off- Nutch had never had the chance to do so because of said shark, and Geo had already passed out and fell overboard due to obvious reasons).

Mikai Istou

The old, shambled pirate ship slowly approached the dock. It was a bustling port city, far larger then the old Espoir Gauche, designed for hardy sailors to obtain supplies if they were to sail westerly. The city was large and buildings stretched on for miles and it looked as though there was a festival, too!

This docks huge, Trudi commented. You really think were gonna find our ship here?

Fishears shrugged. Weve got nothing else to do but be hopeful. If anything, we can try and sell this scrapheap for some money and if need be buy a new one, even though I dont want to. Anyway, weigh anchor! Fishears shouted.

Er, ghosty? Deck replied, looking towards the transparent captain. This ships anchor fell off about two minutes after we set sail.

Fishears blankly stared at the new recruited pirate. Abandon ship! he shouted. The rest of the crewmembers onboard dived off the ship, those more capable landing in the nearby dock water, those obviously missing a few brain cells (not mentioning any names) landing on the concrete slabs of the city.

The ship carried on sailing, and finally crashed into the edge of the dock. The slightest contact made it all fall completely apart until he resembled nothing more then a heap of broken wood and splinters.

Well, I think we best make ourselves scarce, yar? Fishears said, floating to each one of his comrades.

10 minutes later

The old, dilapidated pirate ship which had just crashed was certainly causing a commotion at port. The crew members had all managed to beat a hasty retreat, and were now assembled in a fairly nearby alleyway, so as to avoid paying any damage fees.

Well, this is pretty pathetic for pirates. THS muttered.

Aye, but it beats being landed in jail, too. Fishears responded. Anyway. This is the deal.

The crew all turned their attention towards the poltergeist. We need a new ship, or preferably our old blinged up ship if its still here. Ill be having a look see around this here port to see if I can find it. As for the rest of ye youre free to do what you want for now. This town seems to be having a festival, so, I guess like what pirates should be doing, you can enjoy yourselves.

The others nodded, but wondered about why Fishears was willing to do things in this manner. By the way, if you spot any capable people out there who you think might be decent, aspiring crewmembers feel free to offer them to join us, yarr? And the occasional plundering wouldnt be amiss, either.

Where do we meet up when night time comes around? Aidan asked.

Theres an inn over there. Fishears said, pointing to one which could be seen from their vantage point. The Sexy Swan. Well meet there when we retire for thee night. Oh, and one other thing whilst I condone some plundering, keep it small scale, yhear? This city has a pretty strong naval base. Our numbers are too small and forces too weak to try and get on the bad sides of them, understood?

The crew nodded. Right then, have yourselves a good time! Fishears laughed, hovering up into the sky to survey the port.

Trudi was a bit miffed, really. Clearly she was hallucinating about the dock on the ship, and now she was in a real one.
The real one was better.
She wandered around, went chip shop, had a whirlwind romance with a local boy, boogied on down with the carnival parade, got absolutely drunk, embarrased herself, got herself arrested, got released again, then woke up on the pavement hurting all over.

Not bad for someone with a busted up knee due to jumping off the boat onto concrete

THS limped away from the ascending ghost, clutching the fresh gash on his leg - for a moment, he felt that his luck on this journey was finally improving when he saw some members of the crew collide with the paved dock and knew full well he was heading for the sea, before he realised how ridiculous the idea of him having good luck was and he caught his leg on a jagged outcrop beneath the water level. He wasn't planning the change his jeans - the blood would probably dry black anyway and he thought the cut in it actually looked pretty stylish - but he could do with something to treat the wound. For all he knew, he was already prey to another parasite...

He headed through the town in search of a pharmacy, shouting obscenities at the festive people who seemed determined to accidentally kick him in the shin on his way. It wasn't excessively long before he came across a pharmacy, and was about to enter it when he noticed that the Sexy Swan was across the road. A moral dilemma ensued.

Bandages.

What the hell, alcohol can have painkilling effects.

Within a few rounds of pints, he was dancing atop a table singing children songs and bleeding in other patron's drinks. Luckily for him, many of them were laughing too hard to care.

Aidan walked around for a bit, unsure what to do with himself for the rest of the day. Eventually he stumbled upon a small tavern and decided to head on in.

Aidan walked up to the bar. "get me a glass of orange juice good sir". The Bartender looked at him blankly.

"...Fine, I 'll have a cola" Again he stared blankly.

"Do you have anything that isn't alcoholic then?" He shouted.

Suddenly, everyone in the tavern turned around and gave Aidan the coldest stare he'd ever seen (Pun intended). Guess they didn't take kindly to people that didn't like alcohol.

So soon enough, Aidan burst through the door and ran like hell, with about 20 burly sailors behind him. He ran past both Trudi, THS and a few other of his crewmates and screamed for help, but they were all far too wasted to even know who he was.

After about 15 minutes of this, the sailors gave up upon realising they weren't drinking any beer while they were busy chasing the pipsqueak, and thus went back to their drinking hole.

"Wow, that was close" Aidan thought to himself "I hope every bar around here isn't like that" and so when he turned the corner to get out of the alley he was hiding, he noticed he was right next to another bar. So he figured he would try this one.

When he walked in, he noticed it was completely different from any bar he's ever been in before. There was no fighting, no huge tatooed macho men, no drunks lying on the floor, no vomit on the bar. Nothing. So, being impressed by first looks, Aidan walked to the bar.

"Err...one glass of cola please" Aidan said quietly.

"Certainly my fine young man! We have pepsi, Coca cola, Tesco value cola, rola cola..."

Aidan was amazed, it didn't seem like there was any alcohol being served here at all. Sipping on his glass of Pepsi he then nticed something.

"Is this diet Pepsi?"

Upon looking around, he also noticed some other things. The lack of barmaids, the abundance of leather, the majority of men dancing to the spice girls...

Aidan spit out his pepsi then slowly turned around to the barman.

"...Err, is this a gay bar?" Aidan asked.

"Of course hon! What else would we be!" he replied.

Aidan stood in shock for a few seconds, then slowly walked towards the door, and dived through it just as the YMCA was starting.

Aidan dropped to his knees trying to catch his breath.

"Wait a minute...Gay pirates? why the hell do gay pirates exist?" He said to himself.

Looking up, he saw Fish ears floating by. He just gave Aidan a strange look, as would anyone if they saw a man on his knees out of breath in front of a gay pirate bar.

"Wait! Ghost! It's not what it looks like! I didn't even know gay pirates existed!" Aidan shouted. Fishears just laughed and floated by.

Aidan spent the rest of the day trying to regain what was left of his heterosexuality by beating some burly guys up in other taverns and making out with the barmaids.

Both failed miserably.

Trudi limped weakly across the docks, her head banging, her knee barely holding her weight anymore, when she saw something.

It was the most glorious thing she had ever seen.

As the words "Charlie's Chippy" burned into her dehydrated mind, she blindly stumbled forwards to enbrace the ship. Instead she fell down the gap between the dock and the ship.

Screaming, she swam badly back to the steps for the dock and stumbles back onto dry land.

Looking back, she saw that it wasn't their ship after all, it was a speedboat. Oh.

Suddenly she spotted Aidan, 2+2=5 in her mind, and she staggered towards him, dragging one leg behind her, nursing a bump on an arm, soaking wet.

Aidan screamed at this zombie appiration but seemed rooted to the spot.

"AhfelldownaseaafterjailanbeindrunkanIhurtallover" she mumbled at him.

Aiden looked at her in horror, not understanding a word.

Suddenly Trudi fell asleep and started snoring.

Aiden sighed and shook his head. This strengthened his resolve to never drink alcohol. Ever.

Meanwhilst!

Approaching the docks of Mikai Istou in the wake of the less than noble end of our crew's rikity old barge, came a small, inflatable, bright orange dinghy. Rowing his heart out in the dinghy was a single person, more visible now as he came into view of the docks.

Straining against the waves, with all apparency of enjoying himself, was a grizzled looking tabby cat, dressed in a long blue coat, a moth eaten shirt, a small amount of very...ominous looking jewlery, and absolutly no pants. His muzzle fur was twisted and tied into a series of short dreads, each of wich seemed to be a different colour. Around his head was wrapped a bandanna, covering his left eye, all topped by a raggedy head of hair that was fairly short, but wilder than tarzan on stella. He was singing something about a little goblin.

With a quiet "Thmp!" the dinghy hit port, and he rose to his footpaws, climbing onto shore, where his was promptly met by a group of very tired looking port authorities.

"Name,ship, length and purpose of stay?" They enquired, trying their darnest to ignore the fact that the cat before them was missing any form of clothes from the waist down.

The cat grinned a toothy, pirate-breathed grin at them, pulling out a tatty cigar, and lighting it with a fould smelling matchstick, taking a drag, apparently ignorant of the fact he just set his whiskers on fire.

"Me name? Well, tha' be a thing I no be givin to any records. Ye may take me down as... Captain Gingerbread, tha biggest terror o' tha seas this side o tha White Star Line."

The port authorities sighed to each other, they had obviously heard all the pirate boasts before. Gazing over into the dock, on of them turned to him quizically after seeing his dinghy. "Captain, eh? That seems like a small shoreboat, so I guess you'd be the captain of our most recent arrival?"

Smiling to himself at the thought of claiming this mystery ship, his whiskers smouldering away, Gingerbread replied in the positive.

"Oh good. He you go then, Captain." The attendant replied, handing over a bill for dock repairs, along with an estimate for the damage to the ship previously abandoned by our beloved pirate gang. That is to say it was scrap, and had been sold to a local art school for still lifes.

Hours later, Gingerbread could be found glumly staring into his grog, having spent all but the last few dubloons of his lifetime's treasure hoard... which wasn't all that much really... on the dock bills. Still, at least this drunkard on the table was amusing him, he'd already put a gold coin into the pool on him falling off the table into an embarrising yet slightly erotic predicament in approximatly 4 minutes and 30 seconds...

Captain Gingerbread was not to be the only trouserless rapscallion to arrive at the sign of the Sexy Swan that evening. Precisely four and a half minutes later, the door to the inn slammed dramatically open, creating a gust of wind that knocked THS ever so slightly off balance so that he toppled over and crashed to the ground on top of a passing barmaid, his face burying itself in her bountiful cleavage and drinks flying everywhere.

"Why hallo thar..." mumbled the fox. The barmaid shrieked and shoved him back onto his feet. He swayed gently for a few moments as the barmaid got up and dusted herself off, then he flopped onto the nearest stool.

"Ahem", ahemmed the figure in the doorway, who was slightly indignant at having his dramatic entrance ruined. He was a tall, gaunt figure, with wild, back-length hair that flailed in the wind and a thick, tangled beard to match. He was bare-foot, wearing a ragged, black trenchcoat; a sodden, threadbare tunic; and nothing below save a pair of thick, woolen hose. He strode over to the table previously occupied by THS.

"Oi, you!" yelled the barman, "Close the bloody door! It's freezing out; you'll make the inn cold."

The figure went back, closed the door, then strode over to the table once more.

At this point, THS groggily lifted his head to look at the newcomer. "Lokki? Lokki issat you? I mush be dreamin'... I though' you wash dead."

"Oh? And let you guys keep the rum all to yourselves? Preposterous! What ever made you think I'd do a silly thing like that?" asked Lokki.

"You fell overboard!"

"Nonsense. Just went for a quick swim is all."

"Bu- buh... you wass eaten bys a shark!"

"Piffle! T'was nothing! As soon as beast started to drag me down to the briny deep, 'twas a simple matter of whipping out my sword and cutting myself free. Then it just floated back to the surface like... well, a dead fish. Then I just stretched out on the monster's back and drifted for days upon days."

"Hang about. Din't thish only happen thish morn'n?"

"What? Well, okay, hours then. You sort of lose all sense of time when you're drifting atop a dead shark, don't you know. Anyway, so there I was, fashioning some rope out of my pantaloons, when what should I catch sight of but a pair of sea turtles swimming along happily. Naturally, I did the obvious thing: I lassoed both of them and tied them to the shark's dorsal fin before setting about filling the belly of the beast with every last scrap of metal I could find - money, crossbow bolts, lute strings, even my beloved rapier - so that it would react to produce a noxious, volatile gas. Then all I had to do was I set it alight and - voila! - a rudimentary jet ski, which I rode all the way to land. At least, that was the plan. As it happened it just exploded and threw me to the docks instead. But it seemed like a good idea at the time!"

"Oh," said THS, "I see." He then slumped over onto the table and passed out.

After a few minutes' pondering, Lokki shook the fox awake. "You... you guys do still have the rum, don't you?"

"Ermmm... I thinksh..." slurred THS, the alcohol clouding his thoughts, "I shink we leff it on t'old ship, din we? Yeah, thass right."

"Oh for f..." sighed Lokki.

OOC: I changed my mind. 😀

The crew of Captain Fishears had spent the entire day to their own selfish activities, which generally consisted of hurting themselves or getting drunk. Mostly both put together.

But whilst they were haphazardly causing damage, the dead Captain himself was doing something far more productive- searching for their old ship. It was entirely possible that it wasnt here at all, and instead the two inhabitants of it before, Ori and Arista, had buggered off back to Espoir Gauche. As the ghost continued to float within the air, surveying the site, he sighed to himself as, typically, there was no familiar ship to behold.

Yarr, this prove to be quite the dilemma Captain Fishears said to himself, assuming the position of The Thinker whilst remaining poised in the air. I suppose we could simply steal another ship, but our old one was perfectly fine yarr. He shifted position, one that resembled flexing of his perfect ghostly muscles. And what of my foxy protg. I picked him for a special reason, and that wasnt to be seafood. Bugger. He might still be alive, but The Captain changed poses again, and just as he was about to continue mumbling to himself, he suddenly stopped, he was getting nowhere. A sudden realization.

It was snowing.

Yarr, so this be what the festival is about? he thought aloud. I hadnt took notice what the time of the year be He looked around, and saw that snow fell everywhere upon the island. As the city lights came on in response to the dark, it made quite an intense scene. I should be meeting back with the younguns

He dived from the air down to the ground, straight into the Sexy Swan from the ceiling and stopped mid-flight until he was at the bar area. Of course, he had never planned to stop where he had done so- right before Captain Gingerbreads lower half and spying a spot he did not wish to see.

Yarr! What kind of man is this indecent?! he shouted.

Outside, the snow began to pick up heavier and heavier, nearing blizzard proportions.

OOC: Yay Nutch

Gingerbread cheered heartily as THS took a tumble, winning him nice prize. I oughta buy the lad a grog. He thought to himself, if anythin', t'would only make tha pup mo' entertainin! His train of thought however was interupted by a chill around his neather-regions as the ghostly figure of the late Captain Fishears appeared, yelling about indecency.

The cat replied by leaping backwards onto his feet in shock. "Get ye foul breath of tha hell's six winds away from me anchor ye a'curs'd soul o' tha damned!"

"Who's breath are ye calling foul, ye smell like an outhouse chimney!" Fishears replied, indignantly.

"It so happens this be tha scent of class, spirit." Gingerbeard took another puff on his cigar, whiskers still smouldering away. "An' in case ye not be noticing, tha lack o' leggins be in fashion amongst tha living right now." He grinned at Fishears.

Just when things already seemed awkward enough, Deckman entered the tavern as dramatically as he could - which wasn't very much so at all, as nearly everyone was too drunk or distracted to notice. He was missing his shirt, and one of his trays had new scratches in it.

"Have I started a trend?" Lokki inquired.

"Lokki, old chap!" Deck exclaimed at his ressurected crewmate. "Didn't you - well, what the hell happened with you and the shark?"

"To make a long story short, I turned the shark into a jet ski and I ended up here. Well, that's not entirely true..." Lokki kept talking, but Deck had already tuned out - all he could hear was "Shooting Shark" by Blue Oyster Cult playing in his head.

"...how you managed to get into such an odd state yourself," Deck managed to hear once he snapped out of it.

Deck took a seat at the bar. "What? Oh, all this. Well, I was just wandering around this city, looking for something to keep me occupied. All of a sudden, a strange man wearing three eyepatches ran up to me and just started attacking me with a giant spork. We dueled for about 5 minutes, until I finally managed to knock him down."

"So how does that explain your missing shirt?"

"Well, I stopped paying attention to him once he was down, so he used that opportunity to rip my shirt off and yell 'NUKE ALL THE WHALES!' Then he took off."

"Yarr, that be Josef Von Zigglina. He's the official town drunk," said Fishears, who had been listening in on the conversation.

"Drunk?" said Deck. "Ah, that would explain it."

"Actually, tha's what he's usually like when he's sober."

"Let's move on," said Deck, snatching a glass of rum off the counter and throwing it at THS (who was currently trying to do handstands on the counter) for no apparent reason. He looked at the quirky, trouserless tabby cat sitting across the bar. "That guy looks like he'd make an interesting crewmate. What can you tell me about him?"

The Sexy Swan

Captain Fishears gave a glance toward Gingerbread, before then resuming focus towards Deckman. He isnt packing much equipment, as ye can see. He might have some money and maybe some unusual talents, but Im not sure if Id be wanting him to join me crew, Fishears explained. He assumed the position of sitting down upon one of the barstools, despite the fact he wasnt really sitting, just floating above it.

Anyways. One of yee had best make reservations for a room or two. I think were gonna be stuck here tonight regardless. Fishears pointed to a window where the thick blizzard prevented anyone from seeing any other nearby buildings. It was extremely thick and heavy falling, and setting quickly too. Itd make moving about near impossible unless theyd want to freeze to death (more so for the silly sods who were running around half naked).

Howd the ship searching go? Deck asked.

Hmp. Not we- Fishears was cut off mid sentence as he picked up another individuals conversation. Two men were talking in a nearby corner, two whom seemed sober enough, yet were still loud enough so that he could hear despite each other being quite a distance away and the inn being extremely loud.

Two pirate ships came into port today? one of them asked the other, taking a sip of his drink.

Aye. The first one was a giant of a ship, twas. Looked quite magnificent as well, I might add. Funny thing is, it only had two people on board. Replied the other.

Just two pirates?

Aye. The ship was quickly reported, and the marines confiscated it.

They confiscated it?!

Aye. They didnt have much time to conduct a search and carry out all those formalities, not with the festival going on. They apprehended the pirates and took the ship into custody. Heard it had quite a nice amount of supplies on it, too. As for the two pirates, eh, theyll probably be hanged by tomorrow.

Huh, I miss all the fun whilst Im tending that damn rabbit stall hey up. Nodded the first. What about the second pirate ship? Did ye hear about that?

Aye. Twas a poor ship if I ever had saw. In a mighty shambles. It came up to port, and simply crashed into it! Completely broke apart. I heard quite a few people were injured from the wreckage.

Huh. Pirates. Whod have thought any of them would be stupid enough to come to here, of all places with the marine presence thats here and all. Its quite a navy stronghold!

Aye. See, thats quite the scary thing about it, yknow? the second began. The second pirate ship well, it was old and rusty, true, but do you know what the pirate flag was of?

the pirate flag?

Aye! It was that of the old fearsome pirates who used to haunt this very island! People are all frightened saying that their return has sparked about this very blizzard!

But thats crazy, isnt it?

NAY! The second man shouted. Not if ye knew whom those pirates be. The old Jolly Helpers! Most of them have been dead for quite some time, executed on this island twenty years ago. But its coming to be about that time now, on the anniversary of their first plundering. The Jolly Helpers were unrivalled at sailing and plundering in these conditions, and they say they could be back tonight

Fishears simply sat, as he eavesdropped on the two mens conversation, his eyes widened with hope. They might be able to retrieve their old ship afterall!

SICIOOC: Pach, good boy, how should I write myself back into this? Hmm? Maybe dimensional timewarp abuse? Or some crazy plothole that lands me on that ship?

I like the warp better.

Man, I'm WARPIN!

My writing skills are off tonight. Blame it on the police.

IC:
Suddenly, in the already active and isnane bar, the back door slammed open and out kramer'd a man with dark tone, kerry king-esque beard and long hair, brandishing a viking hat and a laser gun. "Dude, we're out of funyons and Slayer hasn't been invented yet!" He preached, heroically.

The bartender dropped the bottle of whiskey he was holding and slapped his hands to his cheeks in disbelief, "OI, THAT BE GEO," he yelped in an exceptionally half-assed Cockney accent "BUT THEM SEA SALTING PIRATES TOLD MY PAIN AND STRIFE THAT YOUR BOATS BEEN FED TO THE WATERS, SHE DID! WHY, SHE DID, GUVNAH!"

With the whole bar looking at him in shock and admiration (apart from that jewgoat), Geo slowly sat down on an open stool, and sipped his neighbor's gin & tonic. He took a loaded tobacco pipe out of his vest and drew a match from behind his headband. He struck the match across a nearby wench (who giggled in raw ECSTASY, mind you) and lit the pipe, enveloping himself in the tickling embrace of the smoke.

One could tell just by looking at him that he was a loose cannon ex-cop on the edge that played by no rules except his own rules, which were no rules.

"Relax, fair tender," he puffed, leaning onto the bar, "and let me rejoice the bar in the story of my coming to be."

At sometime in the past, but exceptionally recent as to where Lokki got eaten by that shark.

"Oh, chap," Geo mused, looking at the sky while sipping on a gin & tonic, wondering how much of his vast personal riches he would donate to orphans and lepers that month, "Truely, thank the Lord that granted us such a beautiful sea, and such a bountiful ship."

He then proceeded to rip the HELL out of a blunt, and went back to the side of the boat. Goldstein trotted up next to him and, without warning, shoved him over the side of the boat.

Geo, hanging by a finger, yelled out, "WHY, GOLDSTEIN, HOW COULD YOU BETRAY ME THIS WAY?"

Goldstein palnned to tip him over and steal his gold, but didn't think it through far enough- being a goat, he had no telekinesis or thumbs to pickpocket Geo with. Being so, he trotted off as Geo fell to his proposed doom.

However, Geo did not fall to his doom, as due to a slip in the fabric of time a DIMENSIONAL TIME WAAARRRPPPPPP opened up behind him, and he fell into that which does not exist.

"Well, man, I can't really remember what happened in there. Y'know, man? Was all Floyd and s**t. But I came out with this hat and lazer gun, and I still got the cannon, so it's all good." Geo spoke, patting the leather bag beneath his vest and taking another puff of his pipe.

"Hey, what happened to your proper accent?"

"F**k off. Anyways, so I emerged in that backroom over there about 3 years ago, and bided my time eating funyons and listening to the bar's collection of jock jams. I dragged myself through famine and near-insanity untill the day when I knew you would all arive. Total twilight zone s**t, mang."

And everyone wept with joy. For there was Geo.

Once Geogwe was finished regaling the patrons of the inn with his tale of inter-dimensional adventure, Lokki turned his attention to the two dockhands that Fishears seemed so engrossed in.

Lokki was not one of the great statisticians - if he was he would be probably be fantastically wealthy by now - but he did not have to be to realise that if the chances of there being more than one pirate ship in the vicinity of Mikai Istou were slim, then the chances of there being more than one hereabouts crewed by just two people were virtually non-existant. There was no doubt in his mind; their ship had been captured by the Navy. This warranted further investigation. He pulled out a comb, ran it through his hair in a futile attempt to return his tangled mane to some semblance of a civilised haircut, pulled it back into its usual pony-tail and swaggered over to the two conversationalists.

"I say, good sirs," he announced, "I couldn't help but overhear you two discussing the two pirate vessels that come into port today. Would you terribly mind me asking a few questions?"

The younger of the two grunted and turned to face Lokki. "What's it to you?"

"Erm," hummed Lokki, "I'm a journalist! Yes." He rummaged around in his pockets for some parchment and a quill. As an afterthought, he added, "Freelance."

The older man looked Lokki up and down quizically, taking in everything: the soaked clothing; the wild, unkempt hair; the thick, scruffy beard; the general disheveled look; the distinct lack of trousers. "Are ye sure, young fella-me-lad? You don't look much like a journalist. There's something... missing."

Lokki froze. He thought quickly. "Ah, of course," he said, removing his arms from his coat sleeves, then producing a fedora from one of his pockets. "'Tis rude to wear one's hat indoors, don't you know," he pointed out as he put the hat on.

The man nodded, satisfied. "Ah, o' course. That's more like it. Sorry. Now what'd ye want?"

"First off, did you catch sight of the two pirates on the first ship? What did they look like?"

The dock worker stroked his chin thoughtfully. "T'were one male and one female, I remember that much. The man was human, with dirty-blonde coloured hair, and I think the girl were a fox - literally. Very dark fur."

Lokki murmured an acknowledgement. That was their wayward shipmates alright. The nerve of them, leaving them to die on that gods-forsaken island like that! "And did you hear much about that cargo that was confiscated?"

"Hmmm... not much in the way of treasure, but a hell of a lot of sea-farin' supplies."

"I seem to remember hearing 'twas mostly rum," the younger man chipped in, "Yeah, tons of rum."

Lokki's eyes widened in anger briefly. The bastards! That was his rum! However, he caught himself quickly and resumed his calm persona. "I see. Now, do you happen to know whereabouts they took the ship or its cargo...?"

Where they were taken? Thats simple enough. The navy base north of the city. The older man said, pointing over his shoulder with his thumb, indicating the direction of north. Im guessing youre probably from a nearby island, right? You might not know too much about it? Anyway, I wouldnt suggest scooping around there for a story the navy will simply tell you to get lost. They like to keep to themselves.

Meanwhile, whilst they continued their conversation, Fishears attention was taken away from Lokki and focused more upon Geo who had just entered, claiming to have been absorbed in a dimensional time warp and been waiting in the lavatory for the past 3 years. Of course, the obvious conclusion is that Geo had simply been smoking too much. He was proving to be a liability. Funny chap, but mang theres a distinct lack of co-operation with him.

wheres Aidan and Trudi? Fishears asked, upon suddenly realizing their absence. The rest of the crew conscious enough and sober enough to have heard the ghosts question simply shrugged.

Ive ordered us a room, Deck said. I said were gonna open up a tab and pay in the morning. Not sure with what money, but

Eh, nevermind about it. Well worry when the time comes- Fishears began, before he was stopped with Lokkis return.

Our ships on this island, chaps. Lokki revealed. And from the sounds of it, our old crewmates were on it, too.

Both captured by the marines. Fishears stated.

Right. Wont be easy to get back by all means, you see, it might be better to steal just another ship, but Lokki began to suggest.

But that be our ship, and we wouldnt be much of a band of pirates if we didnt take it back. Fishears replied, smirking. We take it back tomorrow.

"I was going to say 'but that's my rum', but yeah, sure, that too."

"Uh, Hey Ghostface," Goldstein piped up suddenly, "In case you haven't noticed, we're not much of a group of pirates. I mean, a lawyer, a stiff, a drunk, a stoner, some sort of horrible half-breed animal-man, some sort of horrible naked half-breed animal man, and the rest of these miscreants, not to mention a talking goat, don't exactly scream "Scourge of the seas" to me, I don't know about yourself. I say we just steal some navy ship. It'll be better equipped <i>and</i> stocked. It makes no sense to try and steal our old ship when there's such nicer ones about, now, does it?"

The inhabitants of the bar stared at the goat (In no small part because he was a talking goat) for several beats before he let out a sigh and was heard to say, "Right. How are we going to get it back, then?"

Nevertheless, Aiden and Trudi never arrived at the Sexy Swan that night. Due to the severe weather, Aiden couldn't differentiate an elephant from a daisy.

Trudi had a bit of a shock waking up again with the queen of hangovers tied to a bed in a strange room. "WTF" she yelled.
"Tell me about it" she heard Aiden say a few feet away. Again, tied to a bed.

Out of the darkness a man emerged. He was a pale man with the air of a man who hasn't seen the outside world for centuries. Or days at least.
"I hear you have no money..."
"How'd you know that?!" Trudi yelled again.
"I checked your pockets. Now, we could come to a comprimise, as it were..."
"Then why are we tied to beds" Aiden frowned.
"To stop suspicion!"
Aiden and Trudi just stared.
"Now. As it were, my air-con is suffering... problems. My bar is absolutely freezing. While this suits me fine, my customers dissagree. And they come first. So could you sort it out for us?"
"Why?" Aiden butted in before Trudi could curse.
"If you succeed, I could offer you a temporary job to finance you for the meantime"
Trudi stared again.
"How much" Aiden asked, clearly being the brains in this situation.
"How much do you need?"
"Enough for... five people to rent rooms" (OOC: they don't know about Nuch/Geo's return and Crim obviously)
"A night?"
"Yes"
"Each?"
"Well together really..."
"...hmm... It's a bit much.... but you are doing me a favour. Yes. Yes it's a deal"
He stepped on a floorboard and the bonds released.
Aiden stepped forwards to shake his hand on it, but the man shuddered.
"I don't do... physical contact."
Aiden frowned. "Promise then?"
"urgh.... promise"
"Good" Aiden offered a hand to lift Trudi up. "Where's this air, con?"
The man led them through a series of corridors to a door.
"By the way where are we?"
"The Sexy Sven of course! My name's Sven"
"Riiiiight" they went through the door. Sven closed the door behind, leaving just the two of them.
"Why the hell did you get us into this mess?!" Trudi shouted, wincing at the echo.
"We need money, right? Last I saw of everyone else Pach is dead, THS was dancing on a table, Goldstein was just sitting there and Deck was fighting someone. I doubt anyone actually has any money."
"Aaaaaah"
They walked along the metal corridors for what seemed like an age when they were both suddenly swept off their feet. Not by some amazing sight, but rather from a gigantic metallic fan. (OOC GT - master of the cool ideas)
"Woah, I'm suddenly seeing everything in pixels!" Trudi shouted.
"Same! Pretty cool since I don't know what a pixel is"
They pushed forwards through the gale, clinging onto the walls.
"You still got your mace?!" Trudi screached.
Aiden patted himself over. "Ah... um... no!" He left it in the gay bar. Not that he was going to tell her that. Not since they both went the same school and therefore she knew everyone he did.
"I think we've got to break the blades!"
"You suicidal?!"
Trudi ignored him, which was a very hypocritical thing for her to do. Instead, she leapt forwards and kicked out.
Smash
Two of the blades went down. She bounced back. "Maaaan, I love wearing boots designed for skaters"
Aiden stared at her. "How. The. Hell."
Trudi lauched off again, missed, shot straight through the newly created gap, and ended up clinging on to a support beam for her life.
"Aiden!!! Quick!!!" She screached.
"Ooh look an off button" Aiden grinned, pushing a massive red button declairing 'OFF'
"...oh"
Some strange music echoes through the corridors. Little did they know it was the completion music from a Sonic game.

Later that evening, Trudi and Aiden found themselves girating around poles in their underware as people threw coins at them. They weren't very happy to find the proposed job was poledancing as they emerged looking well and truely battered and blown about, and Sven's black eye prooved that.

(OOC again - MONEY!)

Captain Fishears pondered the situation. Breaking into a naval base would certainly not be the easiest thing to do, especially one so prominent and powerful as the one on this island.

"Ah, I have meself just the idea needed," Fishears explained, nodding. "I'll be going out to investigate the place meself, finding out where exactly the ship is. I'm a ghost, so the weather won't affect me, and even if they do see me, bullets won't hurt and they can't capture me."

The others nodded. "What about us?"

"Eh... just do what you want for now. Party, and get some sleep. I'll also look out for Trudi and Aidan, wherever the hell they may be. Fishears explained. The ghost finally hovered up into the air, through the ceiling, and disappeared, leaving the rest of the crew to do as they willed until his return.

Having being stood nearby making no pretense of not listening, Gingerbread was very interested in what they were saying. Mostly because his last ship had been mutaniered by the crew, and he really didn't like that dinghy. Even if he had to earn his board up from the rank of Cabin Kitty, he wanted on that ship. After all, there wasn't any treasure here.

Waltzing over, he lit another cigar. "Arrr, I couln'a help but hearin' ye predictament, an I be wannin' ta help. If ye be givin' me a place in yer crew, I be more than willin' to shoot some naval jerks for ye..."